Social Masks

There are many types of masks that human psychology uses and encounters throughout life. But today, we’ll focus on one specific type: social masks.

What are they, you might ask? They’re nothing more than the roles we find ourselves playing in society, in certain contexts. Roles that, despite everything, we don’t really choose. Or, if we do, we only choose them partially.

These masks begin to form from birth. Our parents, school, relationships, work— all these influences shape us, imposing expectations and triggering a mechanism of adaptation.We wear these masks because society demands it.

And society isn’t some evil or unknown entity... It’s us. We are society. We make these rules.

Socialization is the process through which we learn, on a relational level, what is "right" and what is "wrong," pushing us to adopt a personality that facilitates interaction with others.

As we grow up, how many times have you worn a mask to fit into a group, at work, or simply to avoid conflicts in relationships?

How many times have you found yourself smiling, making conversation, even when you weren’t in the mood? That’s a social mask: a role we feel obliged to play to maintain harmony.

Or think about when you’re with different groups of friends. You might feel different depending on the group you're with. With some friends, you’re the funny one; with others, you might be the reflective one, or even the more serious one. Think about the early months of a relationship, where you only show your best side, wearing the mask of the “perfect partner.” Or at work, as the “model employee,” or when others attribute characteristics to you that aren’t yours, but which you start to adopt for social strategy.

There are many daily dynamics, from the most obvious to the most hidden.

In popular culture, the concept of a “mask” often has a negative connotation. But it doesn’t have to be that way.

Sometimes, masks aren’t falsehoods or deceptions, but integral parts of human existence. They are tools. Tools through which individuals communicate, protect themselves, and adapt to the social context in which they live. Without those masks, our interaction with the world would be far more complicated.

However, we don’t always like the social role we have to play. We don’t always like the masks others stick on us with arrogance and presumption.We don’t always manage to express who we really are. How many times have you been told, "You’re not like that," or "You’re a different person," leaving you wondering, "Am I really?"

What others see doesn’t always match who we are. And this can create discomfort. Frustration. Because something feels off.

After all, appearance is not the same as essence.

This conflict between the various "selves" we perceive is what makes everything so complex.

Because we constantly live between multiple versions of ourselves. The "self" we perceive inside, the "self" that others attribute to us, and the "self" we want to be. And finding a balance between these selves is anything but easy.

It’s clear that there’s no immutable "self". Personality isn’t something fixed, it’s not a pre-carved statue. On the contrary, personality is constantly changing, it’s fluid, adapting and shifting based on the context. Every social interaction transforms us. Every new experience changes the way we see ourselves, and the way others see us.

So I’ll end this brief reflection with a similarly reflective question:

At this moment, who are you? Are you who you think you are? Are you, to others, what you are to yourself? Or are you who others believe you to be?